|not my dog|
First, I can't think about my deadline, which is November 14 when I get my blood checked again. November 14. Five and a half weeks away. Thirty-eight days away. Potentially 114 meals away with 76 snacks (I'm not proud). Because I will make myself crazy. And, I will think it all ends after the 14th when I get my blood checked again, but it doesn't. I will always be susceptible to high blood pressure, high cholesterol, heart attack, and stroke. It's just in my genetics. And the best way to fight that is to stop being a fatty. And, the only way to stop being a fatty is to watch what I eat. And by watching what I eat, I mean, I shouldn't eat meat or animal products and no more processed sugar.
When I look at it that way, I want to jump off a cliff.
Instead, I think about it this way: I choose not to eat meat and animal products because I feel better....ugh. I can't even finish that sentence. Let's just say, this is my choice and this is who I am now. (I absolutely love typing "vegan" into Youtube and seeing an ad for python sausage.)
|old photo, same technique|
Monday, I was back on track with fat-free yogurt, honey, granola, and banana for breakfast; an apple for a snack; and lentil soup for lunch. Work got in the way of exercise--I kid you not, I haven't stepped away from this computer since 7:30 yesterday morning. Of course, I could take this time now to exercise, but I prefer to process my thoughts about all the processed foods racing through my veins. And I do mean racing. My heart is still pounding.
Groom came home with a pile of vegetables from Blackie's in Auburn and went to town on some haddock he picked up at Gilmore's in Bath. We added some roasted string beans and we were in business. No butter, minimal olive oil, fat-free/low sodium chicken broth, and plenty of vegetables. But, I do have to admit, I tossed some sea salt on the green beans before roasting them. I have no regrets.
Today, I'm hoping to take a nice long walk if I can fit it in. Tomorrow, I head to the spine people for a cortisone shot to be injected into my spine. I don't want to think about it. But, I'm hopeful it will lessen some of the ruptured disc pain. I tend to forget to be careful but my body does a nice job of reminding me, like this weekend when I saw the garage door closing and instinctively caught the weight of it with my left hand. My body sent me more than just a warning shot across the bow and it sent me into a fit of hysterical laughter. Now the pain (the pain!) is showing up in the form of ocular migraines and the sensation that someone is literally, and I mean literally, crushing the bones in my left hand (my hand!). I still can't figure out what happens with a ruptured disc. Does it heal? Ever? Or is this what I do now? I eat mostly vegetables and I sit quietly while k-k-k-k-k-ken c-c-c-comes to k-k-k-kill my hand with a steamroller?